Been thinking alot today. About what i REALLY wanna do. And what do i really want. I found out my wife bought a new car. Seems like she's enjoying life now. She couldn't live without such luxuries in her life. She's lucky to have her family back. She wants me dead. I know it. She want to see me go down, but i'm so so sorry bitch! I will not stand down without a good fight. You can belittle me all you want. You can talk bad about me all you want. But at the end of the day, remember, you are just like second hand goods. Initially i wanted to patch things up with her. But, sigh. Her attitude just gets in the way. But it is ok. The Great Laws Of Karma. Karma will get her. And will get her good. I hope my "barang" works.
My mum was admitted to hospital today. Early in the morning. She'd been coughing blood since yesterday. She will get well. I know it. Coz He told me so. And sorry, He ain't Jesus. He's someone else.
Got 2 cats as pets now. Just adopted them. Haha... They are simply adorable. not sure how long i can house them though... Sigh...
No mood for bloggin' today. Will be posting some pet items for sale soon. Do keep a lookout.
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Friday, November 7, 2008
Feeling Fresh
A great morning to all! Feel so fresh today. I will start my job hunting after i finish this post. Target for today will be sending out 50-100 resumes, call 80 customers, get at least 5 appointments. It's a positive day and i will get positive results.
I wonder what will be my brothers doing tonight. Think i will just stay home and meditate. Enjoy the company of my dogs so much... and i'm happy to see them grow fatter and fatter.
Darn am i addicted to this bloggin' shit! Hah! Thanks Blogger.com!
Later.
I wonder what will be my brothers doing tonight. Think i will just stay home and meditate. Enjoy the company of my dogs so much... and i'm happy to see them grow fatter and fatter.
Darn am i addicted to this bloggin' shit! Hah! Thanks Blogger.com!
Later.
Sleepless Nights
Been unable to sleep early these days. Trying hard to tune back my clock.
Just came back from a lepak session with my neighbours at somewhere near Loyang. It was a quiet place. Hope it'll remain quiet at least for the next 6 months. Star gazed, chit chat, green tea, smoked, and cycled. And...... I SAW A SHOOTING STAR!!! First time in my life i saw one. Hope my dream will come true. Hopefully tonight my brother will be out from BMT. Been 2 weeks since we chilled man.
I miss my son.
Been on a look out for job offers. I need a stable income job. Sigh... Tired of running sales for the past 2 years. Need to go on a job hunt when i wake up later.
Gonna try to catch some sleep. Good night/ morning everyone!
I miss my wife.
Later.
Just came back from a lepak session with my neighbours at somewhere near Loyang. It was a quiet place. Hope it'll remain quiet at least for the next 6 months. Star gazed, chit chat, green tea, smoked, and cycled. And...... I SAW A SHOOTING STAR!!! First time in my life i saw one. Hope my dream will come true. Hopefully tonight my brother will be out from BMT. Been 2 weeks since we chilled man.
I miss my son.
Been on a look out for job offers. I need a stable income job. Sigh... Tired of running sales for the past 2 years. Need to go on a job hunt when i wake up later.
Gonna try to catch some sleep. Good night/ morning everyone!
I miss my wife.
Later.
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Slow paced Wednesday
It's a Wednesday afternoon and work doesn't seem very productive. I keep thinking about my son, my wife. I have a meeting at 7pm. And i have to rush on my statements. Does anyone wanna buy insurance? Please look for me. Sigh...
Been cold calling since 11am today and i haven't got any warm leads. I need to change my strategy. I need referrals. I need business. I have so many ideas and so many different plans of starting up a new business. Not sure if it's feasible. And i do not dare take the first step. I wanna start, but i don't know how. I fell too many times and i hope someone truthful can guide me along. Maybe the person will be my wife. Maybe that person could be my dad. I think all i need is just family support to give me the courage to move on.
Having a hard time maintaining my 4 dogs. I've got a golden retriever, a labrador, and 2 jack russells. Been trying to find someone to adopt my dogs, but i got no heart to give them away. They are my only friends i have now who stood by me 24/7 throughout this whole period. they have seen me at my lowest, and they have seen me at my peak. They are really buddies for life. I love them all.
I will blog again later tonight. I've got no time to waste. Later.
Been cold calling since 11am today and i haven't got any warm leads. I need to change my strategy. I need referrals. I need business. I have so many ideas and so many different plans of starting up a new business. Not sure if it's feasible. And i do not dare take the first step. I wanna start, but i don't know how. I fell too many times and i hope someone truthful can guide me along. Maybe the person will be my wife. Maybe that person could be my dad. I think all i need is just family support to give me the courage to move on.
Having a hard time maintaining my 4 dogs. I've got a golden retriever, a labrador, and 2 jack russells. Been trying to find someone to adopt my dogs, but i got no heart to give them away. They are my only friends i have now who stood by me 24/7 throughout this whole period. they have seen me at my lowest, and they have seen me at my peak. They are really buddies for life. I love them all.
I will blog again later tonight. I've got no time to waste. Later.
Outing with my family in Jurong Bird Park 2/11/08
It's been 2 months since i spent time with my family. I really enjoyed myself. I finally appreciate the precious moments spent with my little family. Spending family time is so precious to me now.
The smile that glows on my little boy's face, the numerous times he wanted to hold my hand and mummy's hand, the way he wanted to bond his parents together, his actions simply touched my heart. Little did he know that his parents are getting divorced. I do not want to hurt him. I believe mummy would not want to hurt him too.
I have a son and he's coming 3 by February 2009. His name is Bryan. I love him so much i tattooed his name on my left forearm. I've a beautiful wife and her name is Jane. I love her, but my heart ALWAYS go astray easily. To her, i'm just a piece of trash, a useless bum, a nobody. We lack communication. I want to give her a good life. I wish she could trust me once again. I regret all that i have done in the past. But it is all too late now. If I could turn back time, i wish i could give her a proper, and a more romantic proposal. Everything happened too fast in the past. I did not treasure her presence. I did not take heed in the things my parents told me. I was too rebellious. I was too playful. Now i realise, i am a father, a husband. I have to be more responsible. It is all too late now. I'm counting down the days whereby i'll lose my wife.
Past few months had been bad. Had a huge argument with my dad. He accused me of having an affair with the maid. I got so furious i threatened to hammer him. I felt really bad after that. It's all about my ego, failing to apologise to him. I know he still loves me and accused me in a fit of anger. I love my dad too. I'm sorry daddy. I have not been good the past few months. Given him so much trouble. Sigh... I need to change.
I hope my wife would see this. I hope my dad would see this. I love you, Jane. I hope we could give this marriage another chance. I hope we could walk this path together, hand in hand, and holding bryan too. Give both our families a chance to cross paths and be happy together. I would want to hold your hand till eternity. I would want to be with you till death do us part. <--- I think itI will die quite early because i don't think i can live long. I want to see how we look when our hair turn grey. And i would want us to bring Bryan up together. I hope you can give me this chance. I'm fine if you want us to be seperated for the time being. Be it one year, two years... I will wait. Think for our son. He needs a family. He needs us there for him. And i need you. Last of all, Daddy, i hope you can forgive me. I will try my best to change for the better. I always tell myself i will want to be your good son, to give you a big house for your retirement, to let you enjoy the comfort of home together with mummy, and to look after my sisters. I want to let you carry as many grandchildren as possible ( that is if Jane permits).
The smile that glows on my little boy's face, the numerous times he wanted to hold my hand and mummy's hand, the way he wanted to bond his parents together, his actions simply touched my heart. Little did he know that his parents are getting divorced. I do not want to hurt him. I believe mummy would not want to hurt him too.
I have a son and he's coming 3 by February 2009. His name is Bryan. I love him so much i tattooed his name on my left forearm. I've a beautiful wife and her name is Jane. I love her, but my heart ALWAYS go astray easily. To her, i'm just a piece of trash, a useless bum, a nobody. We lack communication. I want to give her a good life. I wish she could trust me once again. I regret all that i have done in the past. But it is all too late now. If I could turn back time, i wish i could give her a proper, and a more romantic proposal. Everything happened too fast in the past. I did not treasure her presence. I did not take heed in the things my parents told me. I was too rebellious. I was too playful. Now i realise, i am a father, a husband. I have to be more responsible. It is all too late now. I'm counting down the days whereby i'll lose my wife.
Past few months had been bad. Had a huge argument with my dad. He accused me of having an affair with the maid. I got so furious i threatened to hammer him. I felt really bad after that. It's all about my ego, failing to apologise to him. I know he still loves me and accused me in a fit of anger. I love my dad too. I'm sorry daddy. I have not been good the past few months. Given him so much trouble. Sigh... I need to change.
I hope my wife would see this. I hope my dad would see this. I love you, Jane. I hope we could give this marriage another chance. I hope we could walk this path together, hand in hand, and holding bryan too. Give both our families a chance to cross paths and be happy together. I would want to hold your hand till eternity. I would want to be with you till death do us part. <--- I think itI will die quite early because i don't think i can live long. I want to see how we look when our hair turn grey. And i would want us to bring Bryan up together. I hope you can give me this chance. I'm fine if you want us to be seperated for the time being. Be it one year, two years... I will wait. Think for our son. He needs a family. He needs us there for him. And i need you. Last of all, Daddy, i hope you can forgive me. I will try my best to change for the better. I always tell myself i will want to be your good son, to give you a big house for your retirement, to let you enjoy the comfort of home together with mummy, and to look after my sisters. I want to let you carry as many grandchildren as possible ( that is if Jane permits).
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